If you read any personal development media you may be familiar with the idea that what you think about will become your reality. In essence, if you’re think about the bad things in your life you’re just gonna get more bad things, and the same is true for having good, positive thoughts. Now, if your life is going fairly well this isn’t such a daunting task- focusing on the good things and things you are grateful for. But what if your life isn’t going well? What if you’re hangin’ on to the bottom rung, so strung out on stress and fear that you’re practically sick inside? This is bottoming out, hitting rock bottom, whatever you want to call it. We’ve probably all been there, and we know that things get better… That said, how does one successfully shift their intentions when they’ve fallen so far they can’t see a way out anymore?

This idea that your thoughts become your reality can be evidenced in the above situation. If you have one negative thing happen in your life, you may find yourself consumed with the thought of what has happened to you and inevitably as the theory suggests, more bad things start happening. “Bad things always happen in three’s”- ever heard that one before? Without properly attending to your thoughts, one small occurrence can spiral your life out of control. Suddenly you’re stressed to the point of disbelief and you look around you and wonder how you could have gotten to this place.

I think that climbing out of this kind of situation is the hardest of all. Many people say that rock bottom is an easy place to get away from because there’s nowhere else left to go but up. I disagree, because when a person has truly hit rock bottom, they can’t always see which way “up” is to begin with. I truly feel for anyone who is in this kind of place; whether it’s with finances, love, career or health, it’s devastating and the feeling’s of hopelessness are such a heavy burden on the spirit. I myself have been there many times.

Here are some ideas to help you figure out which way is “up” and to stop the freefall.

1. Talk to someone. Talk to your best friend, your spouse, minister, sibling…. anyone! Just get it out. It doesn’t even have to be someone you know! There are forums all over the internet full of people who don’t know you but are eager to listen and often times can give you advice you might not have otherwise received. Most often times once we’ve talked about it with someone who’s in a different place (and so, yields a different perspective) we realize things are not as bad as we think.
2. Take some time off. Take some time off from your life. Take a “mental health” day from work, ask someone to watch the kids for you for an afternoon, take a weekend vacation to the mountains or the beach. While you’re “free”, think about where you’re at in your life. Ask yourself how you have arrived at your current situation. You’ll first have to admit that you’ve strayed from your path, but reasserting what your path is to yourself by accepting that you’re on the wrong one can recenter your spirit and help you to get back on track.
3. Journal. Everyday, sit down and write out 5 things that you’re grateful for. This can help you tremendously! It may be difficult at first (bottom dwellers are often too bogged down to see the good things at first), but the more you do it the better and easier it gets. Having an Attitude of Gratitude can truly save your life.
4. Take one day at a time. I myself have trouble with this sometimes. Often I fail to realize that accomplishing a goal starts with today! I’m always looking so far into the future that I am not focused on the one thing I have control over- my CURRENT place in life. The NOW is the only thing that matters, and if you’re present in your NOW, then all you have to contend with is creating the best day that you can possibly create for yourself. This mindset can make even the most frustrating problems seem easily manageable. Let’s use weight loss as an example. Say you want to lose 20 pounds; looking at that entire 20 pounds can seem overwhelming and can be discouraging. Instead, try to think about a daily goal. Maybe it’s working out for an hour each day, or cutting your calories by 500. Whatever it is, if you look at the goal as a single day, it’s much easier to tackle and to succeed. Worry about tomorrow…. TOMORROW!
5. Find Your Reset Button. I truly believe everyone has one. Sometimes it’s just going to sleep for a while. For other’s it a walk, a massage or their favorite song. Figure out what can lift you up when you’re down and take advantage of it. Read my post on How To Reset A Bad Mood for some other ideas. I have two favorites- Led Zeppelin and Skydiving, and I highly recommend both!
6. Visualize the Reality You Want. This can take practice; I have not yet mastered it myself. For it to work effectively you must be able to focus all of yourself on this visualization. As with everything, practice makes perfect! Imagine what you want your life to be like; imagine yourself 20 pounds lighter, $5000 wealthier, or working in the career that you want- but you must believe in your heart and soul that it is your reality NOW. That’s the rub. If you’re visualizing it as your future, than it will always be in your future. Steve Pavlina has a good post on focusing your day through visualization.
7. Develop Your Mission Statement. What are you about? What do you want for your life? Craft your mission statement, detailing who you are, what you’re going to achieve in your life and how you’re going to do that. This technique will refocus your mind and attention onto the right path; your path. I will change your life has a terrific post on developing your own mission statement.
8. Tackle Your Worst-Case. Many times our troubles bog us down because we are afraid. Afraid of the situation getting worse, afraid we won’t be able to succeed, or afraid of what we do not know. The 4-Hour Workweek by Timothy Ferris is a spectacular book about finance. Not surprisingly there’s some great advice in there that I think can be applied to all aspects of life. The book details the idea that if you sit down and look at your situation or the fear of a situation that is holding you back, you can show yourself that even in the worst situation there’s a way out. What is the absolute worst thing that could happen, and how would you solve it? If you can write down what you’re afraid of and effectively show yourself how you could fix it then you can begin to let it go. If it is fear or a lack of faith in yourself, this exercise will help you to see that you can repair and resolve more than you think is possible.

Being in the depths of despair, feeling like you’re freefalling without control can be a scary place. Remember that your life is energy, and that every moment of energy spent on being hopeless, sad, stressed, and angry about your life is more energy in the wrong place. Focus on the NOW, redefine what and who you are and don’t give up.

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