We should be what we want to be everyday, I’ll admit. Sometimes though, that’s easier said than done. Since Halloween is coming up I thought I would talk about how we can benefit from the holiday in a personal development kind of way.

Halloween gives us the ability to be something that we would otherwise feel to uncomfortable to be. A Halloween costume can be like a protective shroud… you can “let your hair down” and let go of many of your inhibitions because inside that costume you are “safe”.  No one judges anyone on Halloween, so it’s your opportunity not just to dress up and have fun, but to make the holiday work for you!It’s literally your opportunity to be anything and anyone you want to be without any repercussions. What a gift!

Maybe you’re a talker like me, and would love to experience what it would be like to be quiet… a “fly on the wall”. Pick a costume that incorporates silence… a mime or monk or something of that nature (or, be a fly on a wall!). Maybe you’re an introvert who longs to know the feeling of being the life of the party! Pick a costume that not only lends itself to an outgoing personality, but also something that attracts attention and spurs conversation. You can even spend the day living as a person of the opposite sex, just to see what it’s like! One year, I was my “inner spirit” for Halloween. It was fun because that costume had no rules. I wore a collection of mismatched and unique “artifacts” that I thought represented me on the inside. There are lots of fun things that you can do, and none of them involve being a vampire, ghost, or rubber-masked freak. Think about what you sometimes wish you could experience, but have maybe been too inhibited (or concerned about judgement) and use Halloween to test the water. See how it makes you feel…

Here are some links to sites that offer great costume ideas, and some places online where you can buy whatever you need.

• About.com has a great article on finding costumes for married couples.
• Here’s a great store for getting the gear you need. It’s a good place to rummage around for ideas, too.
• Ehow has a great post on how to come up with a unique costume idea.
• Here’s an alphabetical list of costumes, with age appropriate information.
• Here are some women’s costume ideas, and a link for some “sexy” costumes if you’re lookin’ to go that route.
• AskMen.com has some costume ideas for men.
• For ideas on how to use stuff in your closet to make your costume, visit Costume Idea Zone.
• If you’re in need of some ideas for you kids (this is usually not a problem because kids are soooooo creative), here’s a site for the little ones…
• Finally, here are 101 Halloween Ideas!

Remember though, these places are great for ideas, but you’ll benefit more from the day of dress up if you choose something unique and that allows you to step outside of your box for this night… if a french maid costume does this for you, great! If not, use these links as a way to come up with something fresh!

Happy Halloween…

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NFL, that is. As an American, I was naturally underexposed to the real Fútbol (not that I’m knocking the NFL… it’s just there’s very little foot action going on, ya know)? But, I digress. As I watched my Broncos get pummeled on Sunday, I got to thinking about some aspects to the game that emulate real life problems and solutions. Here are 6 ways that we can learn life lessons from watching an NFL game.

1. Winner’s Never Quit, and Quitters Never Win. This is the most obvious lesson I think. If any of you happened to watch the sad, sad game in Denver you know exactly what I mean. It holds true in every game, and in every life situation. If you give up, or believe that you cannot improve your situation, you will inevitably create failure. Any successful team or individual will tell you that they succeeded because they never gave up and they always believed they could do it.

2. Pay Attention to your Quarterback. Your individual QB is your intuition. What happens when you fail to listen? It’s a false start, and you lose yardage. Just like in the game, if you fail to pay attention to your inner voice, eventually you’ll lose ground. It can be difficult sometimes to hear with all the crowd noise, but trust me. If you learn to tune out the external and listen to the internal, everything will click just as it should.

3. Read the Plays ahead of Time. I myself, feel for the middle linebacker. It’s a tough job… one of the toughest, really. He’s got to do a lot of reading and problem solving and he typically has only a few seconds to do it. If he gets it wrong, the defense could give up big yards… BUT, if he gets it right he has prevented a situation from getting out of control. In life, we must read the situation the same way. What are the possibilities? What is the likely outcome? If I make this choice, what are the benefits vs. the consequences, and are they acceptable? Lucky for us, life usually gives us a little more time than the play clock.

4. Penalty’s Suck. You might as well shoot yourself in the foot. In a game, it can mean having a glorious 60-yard pass for a touchdown taken away on a 3rd and 20 because some guy in the line decided to hold. Ughh. In real life, the consequences can be just as severe. Cheating, lying and stealing your way through life may bring you short gains, but in the long run you’ll pay for it. Let’s face it. In all honesty, you might successfully progress through life (or a game) doing this consistently, but it only takes the one time to ruin all the progress you might have made. While sometimes it pays to be a dirty player in the NFL, it almost never plays to live life that way.

5. Change-up Your Playbook. Nothing works forever. Sometimes, you have to make changes to see progress. Change is good! If a defense played zone coverage through an entire game they would get their asses kicked! You gotta change things up and keep the opponent on their toes. Life is the same way. If you do the same thing day in and day out, you’ll find yourself stagnant. Change something… change your routine, change your exercise schedule, pick up a new hobby. Whatever it takes to mix things up. Trust me, it’s good.

6. Sometimes, ya gotta go for it on 4th down. This isn’t always the best idea, because there’s inherent risk. But, when life gets to the point where you feel as though you have nothing to lose… do it. Take the leap, believe in yourself and go for it. And sometimes you should do it even if you don’t feel you’re in dire straits. Why? Because it can often be win-win. If you succeed, you’ll have gained confidence and self-esteem (not to mention the actual success of what you’ve accomplished). If you fail, you learn! That’s no consolation prize either. The only way to grow is to learn from mistakes. If I thought my Broncos had learned from their mistakes yesterday, I might be ok with what I watched them do… but I’ll have to wait two weeks to find out.

See what I mean? I’m entirely sure that all sports probably have some juicy life lessons in them, but football’s the only one I’m even remotely qualified to talk about. Life isn’t a game, and I am in no way trivializing the journey; at the same time, it’s interesting to me to look at life in this way. To break it down into smaller components and compare it to something less “monumental” makes life seem simpler… less complicated.

*** Photo from Doug Pensinger/Getty Images (my own personal statement here: Al Wilson is the BEST middle linebacker ever and Denver misses him)

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Do you know what your worth? Do you think that what you’re earning at your current job is equal or more than your worth? If you don’t know, here are some tips to figure it out.

• Go to a website, such as salary.com (there are other choices, too). Use one of the calculators to determine what the “going rate” is for your job in your city. Compare this to your salary.
• If you’re below the mean for your position, consider going to your boss with this information and ask for a raise. You determine your worth, not your boss! Check out this article on Forbes on tips for asking for a pay raise if you need some help.
• If you fall near or above the mean, than so far so good! The next step is to examine other aspects of your job. Things to consider include:
  • Distance from home… i.e. how much time to you spend driving to and from work? How much gas and wear and tear on your car does it cost you? Write this down in two columns; one for cost related stuff, and another for hours.
  • Job related expenses. We’re talking about things like expensive clothes, shoes, briefcases, etc. that you have to have to conform to work policies. Add them up (both hours spent and money) and add this info to your worksheet.
  • Food. If you bring your lunch you’re probable doing better than most. But you also need to factor in business lunches if they’re not paid for by the company, coffee trips, etc.
  • Decompression. If your job is stressful, how many hours each day are required to decompress when you come home? Write these hours in your spreadsheet.
  • Overtime. How many hours per week do you work that you don’t get paid for? Write it down.
  • Fitness/health. If you work a desk job, chances are you incur expenses for a gym membership to keep in shape. Yeah, this might not seem like a cost related to your job… however, many of us would not choose to sit our asses all day, but we do because we have to. If you fit this description, factor in the time used to go the gym and your weekly cost associated with a gym membership.
• Depending on your job, there might be other things to consider as well, but I’ll leave that up to you to sort out.
• Now, add up your 40 normal hours plus the drive time, overtime, shopping for clothes, decompression time, etc. and figure out on average how many hours you spend each week on work. You will likely be shocked at the number of hours… they’ll be way above 40.
• Next, take your monthly salary (use your take home… after taxes have been taken out), divide by four to get your average weekly salary. Divide that number by the number of hours you just computed above. This is your real hourly wage. It can be a shocking discovery. I learned that while I make over $20/hour, my actual wage is around $8/hour.

So, the next step if for you to decide if you think you’re worth this wage. Consider how much money you spend just to keep your job (obviously this was already factored into your real wage). Is it worth it? If you really like your job, look for ways to cut costs. Move closer to work if you can. Ask to work from home one day a week. Start bringing coffee and food for lunches from home. If you’re not that attached to your current job, now’s your chance to make a change. Find a job that has a good salary, is close to wear you live and has other perks… (like no dress-code or no required overtime, for instance). Regardless of whether this changes anything for you, looking at your job in this light will make you more aware of everything you do. Like I said before, no one but ourselves can determine our worth; if you’re not making what you believe you’re worth, than it is within your power to change that for the better.

This method came from a book called Your Money or Your Life, by Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin. It’s a great book, and goes into far more detail than I have presented here. I would recommend the book to anyone looking to improve their life and their finances.

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Sometimes when looking for our purpose, it’s best to look back rather than forward. Think about what you wanted to do when you were a kid. What was it that you dreamed of being able to do when you became an adult? For myself, I first wanted to be the lady at the circus who rode the white horse standing up (circa 5 or 6 years old), then it was a Navy fighter pilot (circa 9-18 years). The latter dream I followed intensely most of my childhood. In the end I elected not to go the Naval Academy and I think it was good choice. When I think about why I wanted to be a fighter pilot, it was the plane and nothing else. I wanted to fly a fast, maneuverable plane that could do amazing things in the sky. I didn’t, per se, want to shoot people down (I’m a lover not a fighter). Now, as an adult, the two most prominent features of my life (outside of my kids and career of course) are my love of animals and skydiving. I’ve always had a house filled with animals… usually enough to make it feel like a zoo without it being nasty (currently that equates to three cats and a Saint Bernard in my townhome). Before I started skydiving, I volunteered at a stable as a trail guide. My love for animals in general (horses in particular) is still present in my adult life. As far as skydiving goes, it doesn’t take a genius to make the connection to fighter jets. I get to do the things I would have done in a jet, but I do it with my body instead. Sure, I’ll never go Mach 2 or 3, but believe me when I say I’m not getting shortchanged by going 120 miles per hour flying my body.

Look back to your childhood for some insight if you’re trying to figure out what to do with the rest of your life. The passions in your life that have stood the test of time (and of growing up!) are the things that you will likely always love. I am a true believer that if you’re doing what you love, you will find success and wealth and all the things that you want in life.

So, what did you want to be when you grew up?

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So, I thought to compliment a post earlier this week on the 5 power fruits we should eat everyday, I would give a little love to the vegetable world. Here are my top 5 veggies I try to always have in my refrigerator. Vegetables are like free food. They don’t cost you anything, and you have so much to gain in health. The more you eat them the more your body craves them. I have removed much of my grain/starchy foods and replaced them with vegetables. It has made a huge difference in my health.

• Broccoli. Bean-O anyone? There may be a couple side effects to eating too much broccoli, but it’s worth it. To keep this short, I won’t try to list all of vitamins and minerals that it’s packed with, but it provides a ton of good stuff, including more than your daily requirement of Vitamins C, K and A in just one serving. In addition, the calcium provided by broccoli can be absorbed easily by your body (up to 50%), so it’s an efficient calcium provider as well. Broccoli contains the phytonutrients sulforaphane and the indoles, which have significant anti-cancer effects. These phytonutrients have been shown to fight several different types of cancer, suppress tumor growth, and these compounds actually signal our genes to increase production of enzymes involved in detoxification.
• Asparagus. In addition to providing more than your daily requirement of Vitamin K, this baby packs a Folate punch, delivering over 65% of your daily requirement. Folate is essential for a healthy cardiovascular system. Folate is involved in the methylation cycle. Asparagus is also loaded with B vitamins and minerals. Asparagus is a very good source of potassium (288 mg per cup) and low in sodium (19.8 mg per cup). Its mineral profile, combined with an active amino acid, asparagine, gives asparagus a diuretic effect. It has also been used to treat problems involving swelling, such as arthritis and rheumatism.
• Bell Peppers. Most of us know that you can get a green, red or yellow bell pepper. But did you know they also come in orange, purple, brown and black? Different colors indicate different vitamins and minerals. Red bell peppers are loaded with lycopene and beta-carotene for example… this is what gives them their red color. The red’s also have three times more vitamin C per weight than any citrus fruit (green’s have twice as much)! Loaded with antioxidants, bell peppers help to neutralize free radicals, which can travel through the body causing huge amounts of damage to cells. Free radicals are major players in the build up of cholesterol in the arteries that lead to heart disease, the nerve and blood vessel damage seen in diabetes, the cloudy lenses of cataracts, the joint pain and damage seen in osteoarthritis and rheumatoid arthritis, and the wheezing and airway tightening of asthma.
• Spinach. So, I’ll have to admit, I can’t eat the stuff cooked. I absolutely refuse to eat something that is squishy, slimy, warm and green. But, I do eat tons of fresh baby spinach. It’s good stuff. As far as density is concerned, dark leafy vegetables such as spinach deliver more nutrients per ounce of weight than any other food. Here’s a site dedicated to spinach so you can read up on all that it has to offer you. Researchers have identified at least 13 different flavonoid compounds in spinach that function as antioxidants and as anti-cancer agents. The vitamin K provided by spinach is almost 200% of the Daily Value in one cup of fresh spinach leaves (vitamin K can help maintain bone health). It’s also loaded with antioxidants and anti-inflammatory nutrients. Talk about a power food!
• Carrots. Easy to find, easy to eat, and they’re a great snack when you’re craving something crunchy and sweet. Carrots are an excellent source of antioxidant compounds, and the richest vegetable source of beta-carotene. Carrots’ antioxidant compounds help protect against cardiovascular disease and cancer and also promote good vision.
• Avocado (my honorary favorite “vegetable”). It used to be that buying an avocado was an excuse to make guacamole; now, making guac is my excuse to eat the avocado. I love them! I love putting them in my salads, on a sandwich with turkey and bacon… yummmmm. And yes, it is actually a fruit but like tomatoes… I’m going to assume you’ve always thought of it as a veggie. One of the most nutrient-dense foods, avocados are high in fiber and, ounce for ounce, top the charts among all fruits for folate, potassium, vitamin E, and magnesium. The delicious healthy monounsaturated fat in the avocado is one of its biggest health claims. The monounsaturated fat in avocados is oleic acid, which may help lower cholesterol. One study found that after seven days on a diet that included avocados, there were significant decreases in both total and LDL cholesterol as well as an 11 percent increase in the “good” HDL cholesterol.

When buying veggies, organic is best (especially bell peppers and broccoli) and make sure to lightly steam your vegetables rather than boil them. All the good stuff tends to leach out into the water when they’re boiled. If you’re on a budget (and lets face it, who isn’t) frozen veggies is good alternative to fresh. Definitely go with frozen over canned. These are my favorites, but I also eat tons of cucumber, artichokes and other leafy greens. I hate tomatoes (another veggie imposter), but I know that they’re good for us. Adding a healthy amount of vegetable servings can only be a good thing, and when you consider that almost no vegetables “cost” any calories, they’re even better! So, here’s to happier, healthier eating. And on that note, We the change has a great article on how to get the most out of your food, regardless of what it is! I recommend checking it out.

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